Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Month From Hell

Please don't let the first month of the new year be any reflection on what the rest of 2013 will be like........


Yes, this is a man, and not me. But he looks exactly how I felt. 

To keep in context with the recent blockbuster hit that just came out (based on the classic of course), this month was Les Miserables! Pardon my French.

I'm not referring to the weather, or the cold, or anything like that. In fact, I am one of the few who doesn't usually mind winter, and dreary/gloomy days. I find that I am most creative and edgy on days like that. I get in touch with my inner thoughts more, and enjoy the mysterious and solemn atmosphere.  As long as I don't have to drive in it, or be exposed to bone chilling air, I'm quite tolerant of winter and enjoy the coziness it brings. Of course I love sunny, warm, carefree days, and wish they would greet me more often, but I love keeping in touch with my broody, artistic side, and hence am not bothered by gloom. And plus, who doesn't love cuddling up on the couch, watching movies under blankets, baking, eating hot meals, reading books, and wearing boots and scarves? Also, there's not much prettier or more peaceful than a fresh, white snow fall.

So then WHY was this the month from hell? Two words. Toy Fair. And one more word. Freelance.

That may mean nothing to you, but to a graphic designer flying solo, it means chaos, stress, sleepless nights, endlessly staring at a computer screen, and constantly feeling overwhelmed. It means deadlines and timeframes galore, and Santa's workshop was definitely understaffed. I felt like I did the work of 3 or 4 people this entire month, trying to get ready for the Atlanta Trade Show, Nuremburg Toy Fair, and NYC Toy Fair, while still trying to complete some on the side projects.

Prepping for these shows, Toy Fair in particular, is basically like planning an entire expensive, extravagant wedding from start to finish. By yourself. In one month.  It nearly drove me insane!

This is my own bad, but I don't know why I agreed to do freelance work, when I already have a full time job. It's too much for me to handle right now. With Vance working and in school, and me working overtime, there is little time left in the day to relax, or even to have the energy to maintain life's daily responsibilities. Let's just say, our house was even more disgusting than usual this month. I have agreed with myself to do no more freelance work at this time in my life. If only the clients I've worked for would let me quit.....

A few more things that made this month dreadful:

• First day back to work after the holiday (a Wednesday), I worked until 8:00 pm trying to get my head above water, drove the one hour treck home, and I caught a dreadful cold -- chills, achey body, sneezes, drippy nose, sore throat, cough, couldn't sleep -- the works. It lasted for nearly 5 days. Could barely move, and couldn't take a sick day until the weekend, because there was so much to do and so little time. And then Vance caught it from me, in his first week of the new semester. It was miserable. Our house looked like a war zone. Tissues and blankets every where. Medicine bottles all over the counter, stacks and stacks of dishes in the sink, just to name a few.

• Overtime. It may sound great, but it's not. Not when I'm working off and on all day, everyday, and constantly stressed and thinking about how far behind I am, and how many deadlines I need to meet, and how early I need to wake up, and/or how late I'll have to stay up in order to meet the deadlines. All on top of neglecting my husband and every other responsibility I have, in order to get it done. Or just feeling plain guilty for taking a 2 hour break so that I can watch a movie, but all the while just thinking about how far behind I am and how late I'm going to have to stay up to make up for the time I lost during the movie or tv show break.

• I probably worked right through lunch just about every day. I had one growly stomach.

• Basically every weekend -- Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights -- were spent working, and trying to get caught up with work and meet deadlines.

• Driving to and from Bountiful 6 days in a row, and also driving in a post ice storm, resulting in a 2 1/2 hour one-way commute because of all the accidents. Wising the new Frontrunner were an option, but since it's $200 a month, it's not.

• Just overall feeling like a bad wife, daughter, sister, aunt and friend because I was wound tighter than an Amish quilt. Snapping at Vance, and neglecting those I care about. I may or may not have had several melt downs this month. Too many people needing me to do too many things, and having to be in too many places at once, and not having any time for myself or my husband made for a permanent foul mood.

I like to end on a good note, so here's a list of a few good things that came out of this month:

• I ordered a Kindle Fire HD.  I used the Christmas money I got, and pulled a little bit out of my own savings to get it. I'm currently (slowly but surely, due to the lack of time) reading Water for Elephants, and watching Downtown Abbey. It is a magical tablet, full of endless wonders, and I get twitterpated every time I open it up. Seriously a wonderful investment.

• Vance and I got callings in our home ward- we'll be Sunday School teachers for the 13-14 year olds. We're really excited!

• I tried cooked pheasant at the Bryner's for the first time. It was good!

• Vance's mom visited me at the office last week, and brought me some ready made meals so that I didn't have to cook 2 nights in a row. Heaven sent. Also, our neighbors Matt and Natalie brought us soup and rolls while we were sick, which I was so grateful for.

• I tried two new soup recipes, and both turned out delicious!

• We went to a winning Jazz game with the Ali and Trav.

• Super Bowl is on Sunday. That means football season is over! :) I don't think I'll EVER be much a fan of college football,  but I'm slowly starting to enjoy the NFL a little bit more. It'll be nice to have a break from it.

Here's to hoping for a much happier, and more enjoyable February! Wish me luck.