♬ "Conjunctivitis, from Clogged Sinus!" ♬

(Sing title to the tune of School House Rock's, "Conjunction, Junction") 

This is not a pitty post, I promise. I am simply recording life's most current events, which just so happen to include mucus and pink eye. Honestly, maybe don't read this entry, as it is written for myself more than anything. It is a bit gross, but maybe if you are down on esteem, or need a good laugh, it will make you feel pretty (as I most certainly do not feel pretty at all).

Last week, I started feeling awful. I cooked a delicious, creamy chicken meal for Vance and myself, and several hours later regretted it. I have not been to a doctor, but I know from experience that dairy is not my best friend (which is rather unfortunate, because I love dairy in all of its forms- milk, cheese, soups, ice-cream.....sigh). 

It takes real self control to pass things like this up

I have a breathing/swallowing problem. I have for at least 7+ years from what I can remember (I am going to trace it back to my case of mono, Senior year of High School but it could have been longer).

My nose is constantly getting stuffed, and even worse, my throat will never clear out, and for lack of a better analogy, always feels like there is a slug hanging out in it. Any food that I eat (especially sugar and dairy products) instantly turns my saliva into slime, so basically, I feel like a nasty frog all the time. As a result, I have a terrible time sleeping, and quite frankly, it is just an embarrassing, uncomfortable, and inconvenient problem. On top of that, I have had horrific hayfever/allergies since I can remember, so when these two issues combine, I am not a happy camper.

Go ahead, tell me I should use this or do that to prevent the problem. I have tried every concoction and remedy in the book. I have talked to multiple doctors who give me lame over-the-counter medicine and mediocre advise. I have even almost kind of given up dairy (not quite though, because to me a life without cheese is not a life worth living).

Just about one of my favorite things.....

Thus, I spend many sleepless nights because of my congestion, and last week just did me in. Whether it was related to my creamy meal incident or not, I suppose I will never really know, but for the sake of my own story, I'm gonna go ahead and say that it was the straw that broke the camel's back.

I spent possibly the worst 2 nights ever after eating that deliciously creamy meal. I was exhausted and sleepy as ever, but when my nose and/or throat are misbehaving so badly, I absolutely cannot sleep.  I usually take a little NiQuil or melatonin and an expectorant pill so I can sleep at night, and rub a little Vix on my face and chest. BUT when I wake up at 3am, I am ususually doomed with no hope of easily drifting back off to sleep.

When I do get up in the morning, I feel like a zombie who's head has been smashed from both sides by a frying pan.

I feel soooo refreshed!

My poor husband who has to share a room with me......I am a disgusting creature :( If there be any readers out there, you may officially call me Frog Girl, Snot Head, or Slime Freak. I'll respond to any. 

Hi, my name is Annika, and I love mucus!

Work was horrible because I had gotten very little sleep for the past few nights. Keep in mind, I am NOT sick. This is not a cold, or allergies. This is simply just my head not knowing how to clear itself out. Finally, towards the end of a miserable Thursday, my head cleared up enough that I took some medicine and slept surprisingly well. I woke up Friday feeling much better, and had a productive day at work. I came home and was happy to tell my husband how much  better I was feeling...

I should have knocked on wood after a statement like that, because just after the words escaped my mouth, my vision started clouding, and goop started coming out of my eyes. Great, I thought. I'm so clogged that now it's coming out my eyes!

Which it did all Friday night and Saturday. Eye drops, cloth on face, and rest seemed to do the trick and by Sunday, I was back to my normal B- feeling self. Or so I thought.

Monday I woke up with my eyes glued shut. Washed my face, put lots of drops in my eyes, no make-up, glasses, and went to work with blood red eyes. Tried not to look at a single soul all day at work because I looked so hideous (but of course that was a day that people kept coming to my desk to talk to me.....).

Tuesday morning, I woke up with eyes glued shut again. Eyes so bloody red I dared not go to work. Went to the eye doctor, and he told me I have viral conjunctivitis, most likely due to my sinuses and prescribed me some special eye drops. (Sadly, the song Conjunction Junction, What's Your Function? would not stop playing in my head after he said the word "conjunctivitis.")

"I can't seem to function this conjunction, 'cause I have conjunctivitis"

I explained everything to him. He tested the pressure of my temples, outer nose, and then lymph nodes. While there was no pain, (just discomfort), he could feel the swelling in my throat, and based on the looks of my eyes, he urged me to go to an ENT (Ear, Nose, Throat doctor) as soon as possible. Truth is, I have been wanting to get looked at for a long, long time.

I should have gone before I got married, but now that I am married, I have been waiting to make sure my new insurance will cover visits to specialists before I schedule an appointment. I suppose I am also afraid that I will spend the money on the visit, and or medicine, and they will not detect anything wrong with me (even though I know there is a problem), and I'll just continue to suffer and always feel like a C+ or B at best, when really I want to feel like an A+ (but I'd happily settle for an A-....).

This morning, I contacted my health insurance agent, and she said that my insurance just started back up on its full coverage, so I can indeed make the much needed appointment! Tomorrow I will search for a good place to get looked at by a specialist and make an appointment for next week.

Wish me luck. I just want to swallow and breath and not feel like a slimey frog anymore. I want to sleep like a peaceful angel at night. 7+ years has been too long.

I'm hoping a specialist will kiss my frog self (in a figurative way of course), and I will turn back into a princess!

From feeling like this every morning and night

To this! "Ahh....I feel great! I feel so well rested and not the least bit congested"

Now, if only someone could cure my hayfever while we're at it....

Did someone say the word cat? AAAAACHOOO!!!