No, our lives aren't a sugar-coated fairy-tale.
Sometimes I feel like we are barely making ends meat, or just scrape by. Sometimes I feel like we work SO hard and get so little in return. Sometimes I get discouraged that life is SO BUSY with work, school, family, church, and everything else, that I get far behind on certain aspects I'd love to focus on. Sometimes I get disappointed with myself for not being able to manage/handle everything better. Lastly, sometimes I secretly get discouraged with myself for not ever being able to look like the girl who just stepped out of some fashion catalog (as superficial a desire as this my be), who Instagram's her way cute outfits, adorable new crafts, and delicious meals that she cooked up on a whim with the help of Pinterest. (Please note I am not making fun of anyone who does this- I am jealous of you because you do!) Sometimes, sometimes, sometimes.
But at the end of the day, as I've finished tidying the kitchen before bed, I cannot help but feel so incredibly blessed, and have so much joy. I love our cozy little apartment. I feel so accomplished knowing that it's OUR little bungalow, and it's our hard work and elbow grease that keeps it afloat. I love snuggling in bed with my husband while we eat fruit bars and watch Friends. I love all of our mini little adventures that we go on, from concerts and bike rides, to going to the movies, discovering new good eats around town, and running to the Wal Mart real fast because we just realized we NEED to buy something that we really don't need to buy. I love going to church with Vance and enjoying a lazy Sunday afternoon together. I love curling up with a good book and reading in my oh-so-comfortable bed (it really is a dream!) while Vance enjoys football in the other room.
We always have so much fun with each other, no matter what we are doing. We know how to make each other laugh, and spend many a moment of each day acting ridiculously goofy. I wouldn't trade these newlywed years for anything. Sure, we don't have a lot of money (we are by no means paupers though- I do have a decent job mind you), or a lot of time to do the things that we love. I'll probably never be the world's best cook or most fashionable wife, but I do know how to make a few decent meals, and I make an effort to be a beautiful wife for my husband.
I just want to make sure that I cherish these moments, RIGHT NOW, as they are, and don't wish them away so quickly by dreaming about a house, a career for my husband, the children that aren't quite ready to come to us yet, my big art plans, or any of the other big future events that can wait. They'll still be there for us someday, but once these days we are living right now are over, they are over for good. I would hate to miss them because I'm too busy daydreaming about the future. I truly do believe that life is great right now, and we are in the perfect phase.
Good attitude Anni! You guys are at a good spot in your lives! Glad you are enjoying it. Kids will come and while they are so wonderful, life totally changes and you won't get back the "just the two of you" days for a LOOOONG time ;)
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